December 15th, 2010 | 15 Comments

Moms of Special Needs Children Have Needs Too!

by Lori Lite

Moms of Special Needs Children are stressed out. According to a study conducted by the University of Wisconsin-Madison, Moms of adolescents with Autism experience and have stress levels similar to “Combat Soldiers!” This revealing statement is applicable for all moms, dads, siblings, and  families of Special Needs Children. Families face physical, emotional, and financial demands while surviving on less sleep and less time for themselves than the average parent. A night of uninterrupted sleep is a vague memory for many parents. Holiday time is a great time of year to reach out with a smile and a caring hand. Thank you to Snappin Ministries Special Needs Parents Network and my Facebook friends for providing me with the following insights.

What Do Moms Really Want and Need?

Time for Themselves:

  • Getting their hair or nails done at a peaceful time of day.
  • A night out with their spouse.
  • A nice relaxing hot bubble bath without interruptions.
  • A reliable and capable babysitter to allow for any of the above to take place in a state of relaxation.
  • Joyful outings with friends where the focus is on laughing!

Help:

  • Help with housework, cooking and cleaning. Meals when they are in crisis mode.
  • An offer to entertain their other children when they have appointments with their special needs child.
  • Help arrange them some alone time, offer to take their child/children out for a few hours.
  • Snow removal/yard help.
  • Carpooling.
  • Companionship and an occasional check in of “How are YOU doing?”

Gift Baskets: Self-indulging ones that are made just for moms with no time on their hands, bath/shower items, even special treats baskets. Uplifting and relaxing music CDs. Indigo Dreams Rainforest Relaxation and Indigo Dreams: Adult Relaxation are big hits.

Gift Cards/Certificates:

  • Gas Station gift card to make sure they have a full tank in times of emergencies.
  • Therapeutic massage or spa day.
  • Dinner certificate/card to their favorite restaurant.
  • Pharmacy gift cards, such as CVS.
  • Supermarket gift cards to pick up items quickly.

Smiles: So simple and FREE! Smile when you see a parent and child in a store, restaurant, or playground. Instead of grimacing or staring at an outburst or melt down, give a sincere and understanding smile.

Relaxation: Often overlooked but paramount to every member of the family. The following CDs offer stress management for every age.

Indigo Dreams shorter stories with relaxation techniques for younger child. 

Indigo Ocean Dreams longer stories with relaxation techniques for older children.

Indigo Teen Dreams guided instructions with relaxation techniques for teens.

Indigo Dreams: Adult Relaxation guided instructions with relaxation techniques for adults.

Indigo Dreams: Garden of Wellness stories for all children includes bubble blowing technique to release anger and  positive statements to encourage healthy eating.

 Indigo Dreams: 3 CD Set: All 3 children’s CDs: 3 Hours of stories, techniques & stories

Stress Free Kids founder Lori Lite has created a line of books and CDs designed to help children, teens, and adults decrease stress, anxiety, and anger. Ms. Lite’s books, CDs, and lesson plans are considered a resource for parents, psychologists, therapists, child life specialists, teachers, and yoga instructors. Lori is a certified children’s meditation facilitator and Sears’ Manage My Life parenting expert. For more information visit  Stress Free Kids and for daily advice follow Lori on Twitter and Facebook.

Stress Free Kids Fund Raising Program brings stress management and relaxation to families while generating funds that will benefit YOUR school, group, or organization.

Please share with others

Comments

15 Comments on “Moms of Special Needs Children Have Needs Too!”

  • Gosh this is so true what I would have given for a shower in peace without having to listen out all the time xx

  • I think we all need this. Time I think is crucial – for amum to just read a book or take a bath on her own without interruption. I love being able to make a phone call and chat to friends or sit in someone elses house and drink coffee.

  • Aaah, yes, a night in my house all to myself without children is heaven. My daughter (5) has the “no sleep gene” so it is heaven when someone takes her for the night.
    Good article.

  • A rare moment indeed. Many times we get a few hours to ourselves…but they are usually out of our home. Quite a different experience to have that alone time in our own home. Enjoy!

  • I am relaxing just reading this! Thank you for sharing!

  • Yes and a refreshed and rested mom is so much stronger and balanced throughout the day!

  • This is so true. Moms and especially single moms deserve and NEED more appreciation. When mom feels balanced and appreciated she changes the energy of the home, her children and how they both experience life.

    A dear friend of mine wrote a great article called Fabulous Mom’s at Any Age. http://www.EveryChildHealthy.com/blog

    Coach Carl

  • Thanks Coach Carl. Great message you put forth.

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  • Thank you for a good article – I have posted it on my FB page. It is easy to overlook the needs of parents of children with special challenges like autism. In a family with health challenges everyone’s health needs deserve the utmost attention.

  • Ok- I have just fallen in love with your blog! We love our special girl so much, but it can be so stressful at times, particularly on those ‘no sleep’ nights. I love that someone put in writing the way I feel so often. It was validation, as sometimes you think- if I could just do more.. or maybe I’m not doing something right. Thanks Lori- I am now a big fan!

  • No sleep nights make it so much more difficult to find the physical and emotional stamina needed to get through the day. I remember many nights being too tired to even fall asleep. An affirmation that helped me rest was ” I have done everything I can do for today.” I also had to tell myself, “I am a good Mom.” Both of these statements helped me fall asleep with more peace in my heart. So glad you found us Annette!

  • Thank you so much for posting and sharing on your Facebook page.

  • This is a wonderful list of gifts. Smiles and time to relax are the ultimate gifts for moms of those with special needs.

    Thanks for sharing!

  • I couldn’t agree more…relaxation is an undervalued gift. Thanks for commenting.

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